Sexual feelings, expectations and attitudes vary across the gender. However, there are a few common ties too. Like women, men also want their partner to be aware of their sex drive. Usually, men appreciate sex and intimacy for the sex’s sake. While female sexuality is the ‘dark continent’, the male sexuality is considered to be the ‘dark planet’.
Things that Men Want Women to Know About Relationship and Sex
Talking During Sex
This is another vital thing that most men wish their partner to know. Talking during sex arouses men.
A small talk can stimulate and turn him on and he feels good and it increases his sex drive too. You can instruct, praise or even talk dirty.
It is usually assumed that men are not concerned about other things, as they are occupied only with their libido. However, men aren’t any different from women and they too like appreciation and compliments. By praising, the sexual confidence of men is boosted. You can talk about his looks or other things that you appreciate and like about him. Convey your feelings and see for yourself how the complimenting works.
Men Encourage Fantasies
According to experts, men want their partner to convey their sexual desires. Hence, whenever you are intimate, be open and talk about your fantasies with your man. This will aid your relationship and the bonding becomes more intimate and close on the emotional level.
Stimulating erogenous zone will produce mild, gentle and intense arousal. Usually, it is the penis, which gets more attention from women. However, there are many other spots, which must be touched.
For example, you can gently stroke the areas like face, inner thighs and chest during foreplay, which enhances the sexual arousal. Men usually don’t mention it, as they believe it could turn off their partner.
Understand Your Man
A lot is expected from men during sex. They need to have the skills and knowledge of rousing women during sexual foreplay. Besides, get an erection and sustain it till his partner achieves orgasm. Also, they are expected to connect romantically and cuddle after sex. However, don’t coerce your man for only good sex, but enjoy and take pleasure in the sexual experience together. Many men go through performance anxiety and hence, need constant motivation and drive from their partner.
Men Wish Women take the ‘Carpe diem’ Approach towards Sex
Men are usually blamed for being sexually insatiable. However, women must rethink about this. For men, sex is a celebration and they feel women should take the ‘Carpe diem’ approach towards it. A man’s journey through life is at the speed and swiftness of sound and faces multiple challenges and demands. It is easy to allow the pressure on their energy and time to rob them of the opportunity, pleasure, and joy that sex can afford them.
Sex shouldn’t be on the lowermost rung among the lengthy list of priorities. Moreover, sex also has various health benefits. Oxytocin also known as ‘bonding hormone’ is released during orgasms and brings the couples closer, while at the same time it alleviates stress and anxiety. Also, it promotes healing and reduces blood pressure.
According to statistics, one of the top reasons for the couples to seek counselling is because the spouse is using pornography. However, a woman should not overreact to the matter. A few things mentioned here will clear up the issue: Only about 4% of the population represents sex addicts, so it is unlikely that your partner is one. People are idiosyncratic and distinctive about what rouses and turns them on.
This is because a lot of childhood experiences can influence the sexuality of a man. Therefore, determine if your man is obsessive and he is able to have sex only with pornography. If this is the case, you might have to seek counselling else it is recommended to take out the secrecy of pornography by talking about it. You can start a dialogue about what turns yours man vs. what turns you off? This kind of discussion will allow honesty, closeness and dignity.
Men Fear Intimacy
According to research, boys are more expressive and affectionate than girls, but only until they reach the school age. It is during this time that social repression of feelings, thoughts and words begin and the yearning for human bonding goes underground. This desire for intimacy is so much of a taboo that its mere possibility could almost terrify men and this is because they realize how anxious they are for it. Men want women to realize that the hasty retreat of her man post-sex is due to his own astonishment on how much he longs for a connection with her (and he has been denying this all the time). This kind of understanding gives your guy time to notice that the boyhood practice and habits are in reality perfectly manly.
Sex can resolve any kind of stress in a relationship, but quite often it’s where the stress can show up. Men might grumble about a lot of things such as lack of sex, doing things only on their birthday etc. However, they might be overlooking some serious problems that underline such withholding. Men want their partner to enlighten them about it. As a matter of fact, the male ego is tied down to sex and it is easy for them to dismiss any bedroom related issues as female disinterest. Avoiding such problems perpetuates the feelings of a woman and frustration in men.
Balance Between Devotion and Desire
Men usually like a good pursuit, but unfortunately there are very few these days. However, romance deserves this merit, allow men to court you and make them to realize your desire. According to experts, emotional closeness is all about intimacy, but it requires a certain distance to sustain sexual desire. This kind of tricky balance can be attained by the couples by allowing the partners to have a ‘separate sexuality’. This means, the man must allow her to use toys and the woman might have to permit him to enjoy pornography, so that he can experience a fantasy. This kind of indulgence helps both the partners in the relationship to maintain equilibrium between devotion and desire.